Benefits of habit “Be impeccable with your word”

✓ Increases your integrity
✓ Improves self-esteem
✓ Relieves stress due to bottled-up thoughts
✓ Improves social interactions
✓ Develops sense of honesty

First step:

Say what is on your mind once


1. On your next social interaction, when talking about a person, take stock of what you say about them. Then compare to what you would be able to say to their faces. Those things that you wouldn’t say, don’t say to others either.
2. On another social interaction, actively stop yourself from saying things you otherwise wouldn’t say to person’s face.
3. Once you’ve developed this skill, start saying to the person what is on your mind bravely.
4. Keep repeating until that too becomes a habit.

Helpful tips to make it a habit:

✓ Trigger your mind. Actively try to remember to not speak when appropriate and only speak when the person is present on topics related to them. Before every social interaction you will have, brace yourself for this behavior. It will eventually become an automated habit.
✓ Let the app help.
✓ Reward yourself. Once you’ve gone through 10 successful social interactions without doubting the impeccability of your word, reward yourself by taking out people you’ve talked about before in town and talk to them directly. Enjoy your newly acquired habit to the fullest.

Tips for beginners:

✓ Being impeccable with your words. It means never speaking about others that you wouldn’t be able to say to their faces. Otherwise known as not speaking behind one’s back.
✓ Observe yourself. Until this becomes a habit, it will take work. Observe each social interaction you have and see how much you talk about other people without any intention of saying same things to their face. Count how many times you do it and about how many people. It will give you an overview of how long it will take for your new impeccable habit to develop.
✓ Figure out the reasons. Why is it that you don’t want to say certain things directly to people? Is it social awkwardness? Do you disapprove of their behavior? Is it something that is always done in your circle of friends or colleagues? Are you just playing along? Figure out these reasons and you will find it easier to think of ways to stop yourself from doing it.
✓ Be brave, but appropriate. If the information you have might hurt the other person, make sure to think of ways to tell them softly and explain how you got this information. Even if it hurts at first, sincerity will be appreciated over indirectness and evasiveness.