Benefits of habit “Stop giving up other’s secret”
✓ Improves relationships
✓ Reduces stress and anxiety
✓ May help change your image as gossip person
✓ Increases other people’s trust in you
First step:
Keep 1 secret to yourself
Progress:
1. This week, keep in at least 1 secret that other person has divulged to you. Start with the biggest one that can do most damage.
2. Next week, do the same to 2 biggest secrets.
3. Keep increasing until you learn to never talk about other people’s secrets.
Helpful tips to make it a habit:
✓ Trigger your mind. Start wearing a bracelet or a ring that reminds you of your promise to keep secrets. That way, whenever you have an urge to spill it, your mind will be triggered to keep it in.
✓ Let the app help. A reminder can ring you every day about your promise to keep secrets to yourself.
✓ Reward yourself. Once you’ve gone a month of successfully keeping the secrets you’ve been trusted with to yourself, celebrate by starting a journal. If secrets are too much for you to keep, start noting them down and keeping them safe.
Tips for beginners:
✓ Trust and subtlety. When someone trusts you with a secret, you should treat it like the greatest show of trust in you and cherish that. Also, take it for granted that every secret must be kept that way, even if the giver did not specify it should stay between you two. It is best to assume that anything talked between 2 pairs of eyes should stay there.
✓ What drives you? What makes you spill all the things other person has entrusted you with? Do you want to feel important? Or maybe degrade the other person intentionally or is it subconscious? How do you really feel about the person that put you in a position of secrecy? Ask yourself these questions often and answer them honestly. That is the only way to make this change in you.
✓ Bad company. If you feel constantly enthralled into a carrousel of secrets and intrigue, perhaps you should consider the people around you more carefully. Is it your friends that force you into secrecy? Does it make you feel uncomfortable? Do you feel it’s unnecessary? If yes, seriously consider if those friends are right for you.